Quick Reads, Relationships

Here’s What Happens When You Decide To Settle In Love

When it comes to love, “settling” becomes a touchy subject because there’s always a thin line. Are you accepting someone flaws and all or are you lowering your standards? Is it about compromise or is it about you not wanting to be alone? Are you loving someone unconditionally or are you holding on in hopes that they’ll finally love you in return? See? Thin lines. But there is one huge difference between settling in love and being in love. You see, the only people who settle in anything at all are the pussies. You know, the ones who believe in playing it safe at all times. But love is anything but safe. Real love demands every part of you or nothing at all. It sounds scary but real love is truly the best thing that will ever happen to you. Sharing your life with someone because you both chose to take a risk comes with rewards. You’ll be rewarded a best friend, a confidant, a partner, and everything in between. Meanwhile, the only thing that comes from settling is you wishing you never did.

Here’s 3 Other Things That Happen When You Decide To Settle In Love

You send the wrong message to the Universe.

Aside from not reaping the rewards of the real thing, you also have to deal with the consequences of sending the wrong message to the Universe. One thing I know about energies is that they’ll give you whatever you ask for. The catch is that you can only ask through your actions. When you settle in love, you’re basically sending a message that says, “Hey, thanks! I deserve this relationship. Please remember to keep sending me things at this level. I love it here!” Because guess what? Even though you only settled for the relationship that was beneath you, 9/10 everything else aligned with the energy you put out. The Universe thinks you’re full of joy so it wants to keep giving you what’s been making you happy. It doesn’t know the difference. Why else would you accept something you didn’t want if you didn’t have to? The only way to send a different message is to act differently.

You tend to get less than what you settled for.

Here’s the thing about settling: you usually get even less than what you settled for. If your standard is to not date a man with kids and you settle for a man with kids, you’re probably going to end up with a man with kids who doesn’t even take care of them. If your standard is to not date a woman without income and you settle for a woman without income, you’re probably going to end up with a woman without income who spends all of yours. The thing about settling is that it’s such a negative energy that it doesn’t just bring disappointment, it usually brings misery as well.

Your intuition will never shut the fuck up about it.

No matter why you settled, the voice in your head will always be there to remind you that that’s exactly what you’re doing. It may sound like, “How the hell did we get here?” or “Since when did we accept that?” Imagine the Universe continuously sending you shit that’s beneath you and the voice in your head continuously telling you that you deserve better. That’s no way to live because it’s a constant reminder that you’re unhappy – by choice.

Let’s sum this up:

Settling in love is a choice that comes with consequences. Being in love is a choice that comes with risks. Want to know if you lowered your standards? See if you’ve been taking risks or suffering consequences. There were risks that you had to take to love someone unconditionally; on the flip side, there were consequences that you had to endure because you held on to someone in hopes that they’ll love you back in return. The best way to know if you settled is to reexamine your reason for entering a relationship. Was your decision fear-based? Is your life getting better or worse? Do you feel at peace? Anyone can buy you things, send you memes to make you laugh, or cook and clean. The person you deserve is someone who brings out the best version of you spiritually, mentally, physically, and emotionally. Being single sucks, I get it. But have you ever been in a relationship that made you miserable?

Thanks for reading.

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