I am the furthest thing from sexy during a depressive episode. In fact, one of the ways that I can tell I’m slipping into depression is by how shitty I look. When my messy bun needs a retwist, I’ve worn the same pair of jeans 3x in a row, and you saw me in sneakers more than twice that week? Yeah, the world has convinced me that I have a reason to be unhappy again. However, the same is true for the other side of that coin. When I’ve clearly been on my finessing and fly-dressin’ sh*t, I know that I’m happy. When I’m posting selfies to my Instagram and tweeting “Happy Wednesday!” I know that I’m back to my optimistic self. But honestly, it takes real effort to get back to that. Excuse me if I made it sound easy; pulling yourself out of depression is anything but that.
But here’s how to be sexy again when you do:
Go through your closet.
You probably got a bunch of fly sh*t that you didn’t feel like wearing. But now that you’re out of your depressive episode, the hoodie you keep wearing is probably annoying you more than comforting you. It’s time to get fly for no reason at all! Once you pick out one piece, everything will come together to complete the ‘fit. You’ll be inspired by just having so many forgotten pieces that complement you. Before you know it, you’ll be feeling and looking good again.
Post new and/or old pics.
Post some heat to your social media. New or old, remind yourself and others that you ain’t lost it! All the flame and heart-eye emojis are bound to make you feel sexy again. Your old pics can serve as motivation to get you back to where you want to be. Your new pics, however, could serve as a reminder that you made that depressive episode your b*tch per usual!
Your sex drive was probably nonexistent during your depressive episode, which added to the feeling that you weren’t sexy or desired. Unless sex is how you cope, it’s been a while since you’ve had an orgasm. But you know who to call now that you’re feeling better. Besides, nothing makes you feel sexy like getting head. Let’s be honest.
Listen to whatever puts you in your bag.
Listen to whoever and whatever reaffirms your dreams, goals, and what you think about yourself. What were you working on before depression reared its ugly head? What ideas were you playing with before depression convinced you that you’ll never be able to execute them? Listen to things that tell you the opposite. Trust me, you’ll need the confidence booster after you just went three weeks looking homeless and unloved. For best results, I turn to Nipsey Hussle, Megan Thee Stallion, and anything on Impact Theory.
Get your ass in a gym.
“Oh, I think my butt getting big” didn’t come from a woman who sat on it all damn day! Seeing results from the gym is the fastest way to be reminded that you are, in fact, the coldest of them all. Depressive episodes sneak up on you but if you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready. Keep that energy up and get those endorphins going. I always say that I’m prettiest when I’m happy. There’s just something about looking good and feeling positive that makes my skin glow. The gym gives you both; you can trick yourself into this if you have to.
Accept and apply the answers God gave you.
Any time I come out of a depressive episode, God usually has an answer for something that I’d been asking. I listen closely and accept it without questions. If He tells me to let go of someone – I do it. If He tells me to change direction – I do it. If he tells me to go harder – I do it. I’m usually left with the clarity, confidence, and a certain lightheartedness needed to continue my journey. Honestly, the feeling I get from getting fly, having sex, or posting pics again can’t compare to the feeling of knowing that I just leveled up. Now that’s sexy AF.
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