If you’re anything like me in love then you’re a fighter. You fight for your relationship, you fight for everything you’ve built with your partner, and you fight for your partner. Sometimes that includes the times when you’re the only one fighting to keep it afloat. Ironically, the longer I stay single the longer I realize how relationships work.
You have to be mature and wise enough to know what problems can be fixed and what problems has caused damage beyond repair. Brittany Wong from Huffington Post spoke to a few [marriage] therapists who shared eight relationship problems that they claim can’t be fixed. However, I’m going to give you all one more thing to try for each problem before you throw your relationship away. Because like I said, I believe in fighting for
what who you love.
Contempt. Contempt is so much of a problem that it is the single most predicator for a breakup. If every time you get into an argument and your feelings are always disregarded or treated as if they are invalid then a breakup might be what’s coming next. Here’s your last chance: reassure your partner that he/she matters and so does his/her feelings. Take time to listen to how the situation made them feel then move accordingly.
Argumentative partner. “Damn, I hate a [person] who likes to argue and sh*t” is almost a daily tweet of mine. I remember when I used to be the one who liked to argue until I realized how immature that is. Here’s your last chance: Like my ex used to say, “can we just get back to the love?” If the problem that you’re arguing about is not something you’d end the relationship over, let it go and forget about it.
Chronic infidelity. Cheating is a lot deeper than just stepping out on your partner. It can make your partner feel worthless, inadequate, not good enough for you, etc. If you’re constantly making your partner feel like he/she isn’t worthy of ALL of your love then you’re bound to be single again. Here’s your last chance: have a serious, open conversation about the cause of your infidelity without placing blame on the person who’s suffering from your actions.
Distant/secretive. We need space. What we don’t need is having to guess where our significant others are and who they’re with when they’re apart from us. Here’s your last chance: make it a habit to check in with your partner. Spend more time together than you do apart. Don’t keep secrets because broken trust really might be a relationship problem that can’t be fixed.
Incompatible sex drive. It has to be super frustrating to want to have sex often and be in a relationship with someone who never wants to have sex. Btw, how do you fix a sex problem in a relationship when most people fix relationship problems with sex? Anyway, here’s your last chance: be honest about your wants and desires. Maybe they don’t even bother to have sex with you because you don’t satisfy their needs. However, it takes two to tango! Remember to communicate those needs.
Your partner pushes you away. It sucks trying to be there for a person and they’re constantly pushing you away. When I lost my mother, I was in a relationship but I didn’t let anyone in. Not even him. Are we still together? Nope! Ladies, stop pushing your man away just to see if he’ll try harder. Men, stop pushing your woman away just because your ego tells you that you can handle it on your own. Here’s your last chance: open up to your partner. start off by telling him/her how you FEEL about the things you’re secretly dealing with on your own.
Narcissistic partner. I’ve never been with a narcissistic partner but I’ve been with one with had narcissistic traits and it’s beyond annoying! Here’s your last chance: take the attention off yourself sometimes and focus on your partner. Spend a day catering to your significant other just to show him/her that you’re fully aware you’re not in a relationship with yourself.
Refuses to open up. I was afraid to open up about my story. I was afraid to open up about being depressed. I was afraid to open up about not wanting to live anymore. However, your significant other is/should be your support system. He/she WANTS to be there for you because he/she loves you! Don’t rob them of the chance to hold you down just because you’re scared to be vulnerable. Here’s your last chance: next time you’re feeling like it’s you against the world, tell your significant other exactly how you’re feeling. Be vulnerable without the fear of judgment.
To read the original post on Huffington Post, click here!
Thanks for reading!